Always Hoping

I wouldn’t say everything is back to “normal.” This morning, Nick and I woke up well rested and able to joke with each other. It’s so nice to be married to someone who makes me laugh. It is still painful to laugh but it is definitely good for my soul. Honestly, I think Nick is having fun torturing me by making me laugh all the time. Sneaky husband.

My spirits are high. The sun is out. My baby is doing soooo good. I was able to have skin to skin time with him last night. And it felt great to have him in my arms. No incubator between us. Just mama and baby having some good time together. When the nurse put him back in the incubator, he went back to sleep right away. Usually, he gets a little fussy. But I think he was so happy that he got to spend time with mama that it was easy to go back to dreamland.

I have faith that Desmond will get to come home healthy and strong. The only hard part is the wait. I trust that God will use this as a testimony on how He loves me and my family. How great He is and how He never once left us.

My tears are slowly becoming tears of joy but there are still moments when I think of how surreal everything is. I keep asking, “Did that really happen to me?” Obviously, I am still processing things.

I know I haven’t had the chance to thank each and everyone of you. I had to ask Nick to talk for me because I had a hard time just talking about it and explaining how it all happened. The moment someone asks me “Are you ok?” I just start crying. So now while I am in good spirits, I will thank you.

Thank you all for your encouraging words. For reaching out to us and offering to help in any way possible. For sending us food not just at the hospital but at home. For being there when we both needed someone to talk to. Thank you so much for being our prayer warriors and standing with us in faith. Nick and I are so blessed to have amazing families and friends. We are sooo glad that we are part of the Belltown church as well. For someone like me who doesn’t have family here in Seattle, you’ve made me feel like I am a part of your family. I feel so loved by you all. Thank you. I would like to be specific with names to thank you, but I will save that for later. I really just one to name one person right now.

Thank you Nick. My dear dear husband. Thank you for being such a great best friend. You’ve wiped my tears, held my hand when I couldn’t walk and hugged me until I fell asleep. I am a blessed woman to be married to you. Thank you for praying over me and Des. I am so happy to see how in just a few days you’ve already shown yourself to be a great father. I am glad that I am going through this crazy journey with you. It’s what makes it easier. I love you.

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5 thoughts on “Always Hoping

  1. Love you Tanya. The Lord is already turning this circumstance around for good. Glad you got to hold your sweet baby. He has wonderful parents, that is for sure.

  2. So happy for your turn around in health- both in mind and body. Des is in great hands. Try taking care of yourself-. Your little warrior wanted to make a brave entrance into the world. We love you!

  3. I’m so glad that you’re in good spirits. You and Nick are dealing with some difficult things, there’s no denying that, but you’re able to see the good things too, which is wonderful. Desmond knows his parents love him and he’s going to grow strong on that love.

  4. Happy Saturday to you and Nick and Desmond. May today’s evening be filled with baby sweet surprises. You 3 are so loved. Your courage is amazing and desirable. Baby Des was born to the perfect parents.
    Love & MIss you!
    D&L

  5. Nick and Tanya your son is absolutely beautiful! We continue to send love and prayers and look forward to giving you three hugs and kisses. Stay strong Desmond! Love Karen and John.

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